I'm comparing my life to the lives of other 28 year olds around the world, and then comparing them with each other.
I’ve always imagined what it would be like to shoot someone. Not in a psychopathic way, just in a I'm-a-badass-hero-saving-the-day way.
Have you ever dated a guy so stupid that you are sure his sperm chases its own tail? I have, and then he cheated on me and I got pathetically sad about it.